My first experience in Birmingham was due to my health. I was here to receive chemotherapy. A year was spent receiving treatments and exploring the city when I could. The joy and relaxation I felt while exploring the various areas is indescribable. I loved living in the city but feeling as if it had more of a “small town” feeling. People were still friendly and took time to talk with each other. There was a sense of Southern charm that you don’t feel in other places in the South.
So my husband and I decided to make Birmingham our home, when we found out we were expecting our first child. We agreed that we wanted to raise our child in a warm, loving, and friendly environment. Neither of us wanted to live in a rural area. Both of us also wanted to avoid the super fast-paced environment that cities in other states offered. We wanted to know our neighbors. We desired for our child to be able to live in a family-oriented environment.
My journey to becoming a mom is very interesting. I experienced ten miscarriages and a diagnosis of cancer. Then I endured the struggle of being told that I would never be able to have children. During the year of chemotherapy, I was diagnosed with a bleeding disorder. One of the side effects of the chemotherapy was the clotting factor in my blood being destroyed.
Yet my husband and I continued to maintain our faith, never focusing on what we were told would never happen. We have been blessed with a child for each day of the week. Yes, that’s right. We have seven amazing children. They were all naturally conceived and they are all single births. Since they were all a gift from God, we went back to him for their names and a trend was set there as well. TreVon is 14, Tyreese is 13, Tobias is 12, Tristan is 11, Trinity is 10, Taylor is 9, and Timothy is 7. We are the very blessed and proud parents of five boys and two girls. We wouldn’t trade them for anything in this world.
If I told you that our home wasn’t full of lots of love, laughter, interesting conversations, and a lot of other things, I would be deceiving you. We stay busy and there is absolutely no day that passes where something doesn’t happen. In the moment it may leave me wondering, What in the world?, but that moment quickly fades and is replaced with Thank You, Jesus! They are all unique in their individual personalities and needs. They are all intelligent and are focused on their own plans for their lives. One of my daughters just decided she wants to become a therapist. I wanted to ask if I could be her first client. ☺️ They play sports, participate in the band, and are active in church. Each day the list becomes longer of what they are involved in or want to be involved in. Truthfully, every day becomes busier than the day before it, but I enjoy it.
Most of all, I enjoy learning something new about each of them and myself daily. I even love the growing pains because as I reflect back on it, they weren’t the only ones that learned something in those moments. We all learned and grew as well.
It seems like the greatest challenge for me in being a mom is trying to be Supermom and forgetting to take some time out for myself. Any given day can bring about a multitude of things that they want and/or need done and you find yourself trying to complete everything because you feel like a failure if you don’t. You don’t realize until you encounter your own “kryptonite”, which normally manifests in the form of exhaustion, that you haven’t eaten, taken any time for yourself, or even had a moment to take care of some of the things on your own list.
I feel as if I’m able to speak to moms from several perspectives. I’m able to speak about the challenges you face being a person of faith and raising your children that way with so many distractions around us. Next is the ability to discuss the aspects of being an author and having a family. I can offer insight on being a business owner and being a mom. I’m able to discuss overcoming miscarriages, cancer, chemotherapy, and a blood disorder, only to be blessed with seven children. I can also offer insight on having children back to back, going through and overcoming depression, learning to use your voice to advocate for those that can’t speak up for themselves, the journey of having a child diagnosed with Type One Diabetes (this is the first time I’ve publicly discussed it at all), and a myriad of other things that may come your way.
In conclusion, I can also offer one more thing … the assurance that your children, husband, and you will come out the VICTORS regardless of what your situation starts out looking like. You are not alone and you haven’t failed. You are just human.