My only child will soon become a big brother . . .
With the arrival of a child, whether through pregnancy, surrogacy, or adoption, there’s always anxiety.
What will this new child be like? How will you adjust to motherhood? Will this child drastically change the dynamic of your family? Will there be any underlying factors that could make your child’s future unsure?
As I get closer and closer to my due date (less than a week away!), my mind has shifted to: what’s this new child going to do to my son? How will I change from a mother of one, to a mother of two? Will my patience grow or shorten? Will I still have time for all the things my firstborn loves to do? Can I still make him feel loved with a new baby in the house?
Just the Two of Us
For almost five years, it’s been the “Quinn and Mommy Show”. I’ve spent more time with my son than I have my own husband most weeks. We have our own system of give and take. We have a routine. And when the day allows me to be carefree, I typically spend it doing the things my son wants to do.
Sure, you could say I’ve spoiled him. But what parent hasn’t spoiled their firstborn?
Now, the panic . . .
A new baby is coming. A BABY! Someone who will require the majority of my time, energy, money . . . even my body!
Is it selfish to wonder how this new tiny person will affect my relationship with my son? My firstborn? A person whom I consider to be a best friend?!
*Insert face palm emoji*
It does seem ridiculous. But these are real fears that I know many women have faced and overcome.
My mom was terrified she could never love another child as much as she loved me. But then my siblings were born, and when I asked her about her fears, she responded with words I think about every time my anxiety gets the best of me:
“The love is different. Of course I love all my children, but each of my children are different, and I love them in different ways. How you needed to be loved and how I raised you are not the same ways I raised them. Each child brings something different out of you, and I never felt that I loved one more than the other. I need all of you to be the mom I am now”.